


Loan Words

by WoodenSuitcase



Category: Stand Still Stay Silent
Genre: Acceptance, Boys Kissing, Holding Hands, Internalized Homophobia, Kissing, Language Barrier, Languages, M/M, Misunderstandings, Secret Relationship, So does everyone else probably, and i tried to make it so it's comprehensible if you don't know either, but who knows how well i did, my swedish isn't great so sorry if there are many mistakes, no beta we die like men, sigrun ships emilalli, there's a lot of dialogue in swedish and finnish, this is a mess, this takes place somewhere during the first adventure
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-29
Updated: 2020-01-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:02:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22467556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WoodenSuitcase/pseuds/WoodenSuitcase
Summary: Emil and Lalli discuss their relationship - or at least they try to.
Relationships: Lalli Hotakainen/Emil Västerström
Comments: 8
Kudos: 47





	Loan Words

They stopped walking, and Lalli watched as Emil gave a quick look at their surroundings. There was no need for it – the others were still in sight, and though they perhaps couldn’t see the two boys through the trees, they would certainly hear their yells were they to be attacked. Besides, Lalli didn’t sense any trolls nearby. He still appreciated it, though. Emil wasn’t always this careful, but it seemed he was learning. Or, maybe he was doing this just for Lalli to feel safe.

Emil turned back to him, a smile spreading on his lips. Lalli allowed himself to mirror the expression. After all, what was there not to smile about? The blue of Emil’s eyes drew him closer, his golden hair softer than anything under his fingers. He smelled faintly of smoke, and his body felt strong and warm as they pressed closer together, hands moving over each others’ backs, embracing, loving – Lalli took a moment to appreciate the curve of Emil’s lips before bringing his own to them –

And then Emil drew back.

Lalli made a disgruntled noise. What was this about? First Emil had made him wait so long for this kiss and then they barely even got started – and now Emil was shushing him! Lalli settled for a frown and waited. Emil glanced at the cat tank. He wasn’t smiling anymore. Why? Lalli followed his gaze, but there was nothing out of the ordinary: the others were still going about their usual business, perfectly safe. Or, at least, they were safe for now. Lalli grimaced at Sigrun’s loud curse when Mikkel smacked her hand away from the unfinished soup. For it to be that audible even this far behind the trees… thank the gods it was only him and Emil here.

When Lalli looked back, Emil’s eyes were back on him. The Swede gave him a sheepish smile, then drew a deep breath, readying himself, and Lalli prepared too – but instead of returning to kissing, Emil spoke. It sounded uncharacteristically hesitant, but Lalli was too displeased to care, giving the other a blank look. Emil knew he didn’t understand Swedish well enough yet anyway, he –

Wait. What was that? Lalli raised his hand to stop Emil, then made a circular motion. _Repeat_.

”Vad –? Upprepa?”

Lalli said nothing. Emil cleared his throat and looked away.

”...Vi är pojkarna. Ömse.”

Lalli blinked. He had heard right. But was it…?

”Poi...kka?”

Emil’s head snapped back to face Lalli. ”Pojkkarna. _Pojkkar_. Kan du förstå –?”

”Poika?” The words were suspiciously similar. Emil’s eyes widened – it seemed he had realized the same.

”Poika? Pojkar – _pojke_? Ni har en T på sluttan… Poika _t_?”

”Pojat?” Why on earth was Emil talking about boys? Or was that even truly the case? Sure, the words sounded almost exactly the same – poika, pojke – but Lalli could remember Tuuri complaining about words that were near-identical to some Finnish ones but meant entirely different things. This could all be a misunderstanding. Emil didn’t look as excited as he usually would have – maybe he was thinking the same.

He pointed at Lalli’s chest. ”Pojke.” He pointed at his own. ”Pojke.”

Oh, that was a good idea. They could test this. Luckily Lalli already knew the Swedish for yes and no – _ja_ and _nej_. He pointed at Sigrun’s distant figure. ”Nej pojke?”

Emil smiled. ”Ja! Sigrun är en kvinna.” The first word was yes, then _Sigrun is_ , but… ”Flicka?” Emil tried.

Ohh. ”Likka?” That was a synonym for girl.

Emil nodded, but soon his smile faded. Lalli watched as he raised one hand. ”Pojke," Emil said, then raised another. ”Flicka.” He folded the hands. ”Ja.” He took them apart and raised one again. ”Pojke.” Another. ”Pojke.” He folded them, and with a deep breath – ” _Nej_.”

What? Hold on. ”Nej?” Why wouldn’t two boys… whatever the hand folding meant? What _did_ it mean? Maybe it meant getting children. Emil would be wrong, though.

”Nej," Emil repeated. He looked sad. ”Pojkkarna kan älsker pojkarna inte.” Boys can… love boys not?

”Mitä helvettiä?” Lalli asked casually. Emil looked confused now, and Lalli was pretty sure he had recognized the profanity. Lalli just must have misunderstood something. It could be the word order, he reasoned, Tuuri had said Finnish can be rather liberal with it and in other languages it could change the whole meaning of the sentence. Because – well. This interpretation was just pure nonsense. But then again, what else could Emil have said? ”Minä pidän sinusta," Lalli said. _I like you_. And Emil liked him. That alone was proof that love between men was possible.

”Jag har ingen idea vad du –”

”Idea?” That was the exact same as in Finnish. ”Kyllä, minulla on idea: älä ole idiootti.”

”Vad? Idioten? Minull… _du_? Du är idioten inte!”

What the hell was going on? Obviously Lalli wasn’t an idiot. He was telling Emil not to be one!”

”Sinä," he said, and poked the other’s chest for effect. ” _Du._ Älä… ole… idiootti.”

”Jag är ingen idioten heller!”

Oh, for gods’ sake. Lalli raised one hand like Emil had done moments ago. ”Jag.” _Me_. He raised another. ”Du.” _You_. He looked Emil straight into the eyes and folded the hands. Emil gasped.

”Men, vi kan inte –”

”Jag...” What was the word again? Emil had used it earlier, and Lalli had understood it, but he couldn’t remember it anymore. Hopefully Emil knew the Finnish equivalent. ”Jag… rakastan… du.” _I love you_. Lalli lowered his hands. ”Jag nej… förstå, vad är… ongelma? Probleema?” _I don’t understand what is the problem_.

”Du förstå inte vad är problematisk?” Emil gestured wildly towards the rest of the group. ”De är! Homosexuell är inte okej!”

Okay, _wow_. ”Homoseksuaali? Jag är homoseksuaali. Nej jag är okei?”

”Nej, nej! Jag älsker dett också!” What – was that a _no_ in there? Lalli stepped back a little, and Emil made a frustrated noise. ”Jag - _minä -_ rak… räkästää? Sinä?”

”Rakastaa?”

”Ja! Minä rakastaa sinä.” _I love you_. If somewhat clumsily phrased. Lalli smiled.

”Minä rakastan sinua myös.”

”Men, uhh...” Emil glanced at the others again. ”De vill tycker det inte.”

 _Tycker_ sounded like _tykätä_ , ”to like”, but the rest of it Lalli had trouble piecing together.

”Sinä rakastat minua, minä rakastan sinua. Jag förstå inte probleema," Lalli said again. Emil smiled a little.

”Okej, okej.” He took a deep breath. ”Vi bara behöver att kysser i hemlig.” He waited for Lalli to answer, but the Finn had no idea what had just been said. ”Hemlighet?” Emil tried. ”Förgborgad? Lönndom? Sekret?” He gestured to Lalli and himself. ”Du, och mej. Sinä och minä. Sekret. Ett mysterium?”

That rang a bell. ”Mysteeri?”

Emil’s face brightened. ”Förstår du?”

”Jag och du. Mysteeri.” They were a mystery. Was that all that bothered Emil? Now that he had gotten over his own problem with gays, whatever that had been, he was worried about how the others didn’t know about him and Lalli being a couple. That would be very easy to fix. Lalli nodded knowingly and started walking back to the camp. He could hear Emil sigh in relief behind him.

The soup was almost ready when they returned. The crew was scattered around the tank and its vicinity, and Lalli headed straight to Tuuri.

”Lalli! Sinun pitäisi olla nukkumassa.”

Lalli shook his head. He didn’t need that much sleep, especially when he had had an important conversation with Emil. ”Minulla on asiaa kaikille.” _I have something to tell everyone._

”Niinkö? Mistä on kyse?”

Lalli shook his head again. He didn’t need a translator for this, and he told Tuuri as much. She called the others. Sigrun said something to her, and she shrugged before turning to Lalli again.

”No, näytä meille.” _Show us_.

Lalli grabbed Emil by his coat and kissed him. The Swede made a startled noise, and Lalli immediately let go.

”Mysterium, Lalli! Ett mysterium!”

Yes? They had been a mystery, but weren’t anymore. Was there still a problem? Lalli looked at Tuuri for help. She looked baffled.

”Lalli, mitä –”

” _He was bothered by us being a mystery,"_ Lalli explained. ” _So I showed everyone. I don’t know why he’s like this now.”_

Tuuri turned to Emil and translated. Emil made a weird noise before exploding into fast Swedish. Tuuri translated back to Lalli. ” _He was trying to tell you you two should keep your relationship a secret.”_

” _What? Why?_ ” Lalli locked eyes with Emil – his face was red as a lingonberry and he quickly looked away, at the others. Lalli glanced at them too – they mostly looked surprised and approving, even the annoying one with the braid. Lalli had thought so. ”Emil,” he said. ”Det är okej.”

Emil sputtered something, but then Sigrun took a step forward and punched him. Lalli frowned, but Emil didn’t seem offended or hurt by the attack. She started talking, loudly as always, and Mikkel nodded to whatever she had said. Braidy beamed and moved closer to Lalli with his fist up, but Lalli quickly stepped away. What was it with these people and punching?

” _We’re happy for you,"_ Tuuri said. ” _Sigrun says it’s about time you two told us. She’s been going crazy seeing how you look at each other but refuse to do anything about it._ ”

” _We’ve done plenty,"_ Lalli said.

”Yäk!”

Lalli rolled his eyes but found himself smiling. That smile widened even more as a familiar arm wrapped itself around his middle. A string of Swedish made Tuuri laugh.

” _Seems like you’ll have to keep on studying. Loan words are neat, but not quite enough for effective communication_.”

In Lalli’s opinion, this communication _had_ been rather effective, but he didn’t say anything. Instead, he reached out for Emil’s free hand.

Emil took it.


End file.
